In the days of wind and tide, when men still fished with their hands and hid their money where the fish slept deep, there was Poppy Bush and his Zapata Offshore. He was a man with a boat, a plan, and a Rolodex of old CIA friends. The oil rigs stood tall like iron saints on the Gulf, and the paper trail disappeared like a schooner in fog. That was then.
Now, there is Mark Carney.
He wears a suit like a priest wears guilt. He speaks softly, the way central bankers do when they are burying nations under interest rate hikes and financial euphemisms. But behind the calm eyes and Bank of England diction, there’s an offshore beast lurking. Eighty-three Bermuda shells. Not eighty. Not eighty-two. Eighty-three. It’s not a number, it’s a theology.
Carney, the pride of Canada and prophet of carbon credits, ESG dreams, and Davos-laced virtue—has done more for offshore finance than a Cayman law firm during yacht season. And yet, no headlines scream “O Canada’s Offshore King!” No TikToks break down his shell corporations between protein shake reviews. The silence is holy.
It is time Canadians wake up.
Mark, Brian, and Sean Carney form a trio of financial titans whose careers, steeped in corruption and privilege, paint a damning picture of greed and influence peddling across continents. Mark, born in Fort Smith, Northwest Territories, and raised in Edmonton, leveraged Harvard… pic.twitter.com/eGZdIh0usK
— Vote Canada (@VoteCanadaCom) April 7, 2025
The high-net-worth individuals in Toronto’s towers and West Vancouver’s glass castles should put down the maple syrup, turn off the CBC, and do as Mark does. If you want to save the planet, escape tax, and make money doing it—invest offshore. That’s what Mark did. That’s what Poppy did. You can too.
He didn’t build 83 Bermuda shells to hide. He built them to teach. Follow the shells. That’s the message. Find your Bermuda, your BVI, your golden little anchor in the sea.
Don’t wait for the CRA to come knocking in a windbreaker. By then, it’s too late. Mark’s already at the next climate summit sipping rainwater martinis with Klaus and the ghost of George Soros.
And remember, at Invest Offshore, we know a thing or two about legend-making. We have investment opportunities in West Africa’s Copperbelt that even Mark Carney would envy—though he’d probably register them in Guernsey.
Invest Offshore – For those who understand that real patriotism begins where the borders end.
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